Im already starting to pack my suitcase and find everything i need. I have been shopping a lot of sports clothes because im not the best at running or going to the gym. If i want to exercise i swim like i always has done.
I don't feel good about it right now. The whole idea of me alone in Spain without any of my family or friends seems crazy to me right now. It's a bit like my first class trip to Berlin. I had no friends in my class and even though we had been in the same class for over a year, some of them still called me Helena even though my name is Helene. They didn't even knew my name... i was pretty much alone or people was forced to be with me. It's the same feeling i have now. What if im going to be a loner? I don't know anyone else down there! At least the second time i was in Berlin i had my new class which i loved and i made so many good memories!
But then again.. How big is the chance that all 150 students in Spain will hate me? Im sure at least one will remember my name correctly right?!
God why am i always so negative? Expect the worst and be pleasantly surprised! That use to save my ass but until i reach the positive i just want to cry sometimes.
Anyway i met a girl working in Sports Master today and her friend has been at the guide school and she absolutely loved it. She wanted to go too, but she didn't have the money yet. My driving Instructor also had a student that just came home from the guide school and she said it was the best time of her life. I just have to think about that!
Stop being so god damn negative Helene! Get over yourself and enjoy the Roller Coaster called life!
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| Still a mess but i have my papers and mini dictionary ready! |
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